Getting dressed postpartum (or anytime after your body has changed) - Part 2
A practical guide to getting dressed and feeling great this summer, featuring a choose-your-own shopping list, specific pieces, tips, investing in postpartum clothing, uniforms + ideas and more!
Welcome Back to Part 2 of “Getting dressed postpartum (or anytime your body has changed)!” (Catch Part 1 Here!) This is a collaborative piece written with Tory Stroker. Tory is a Registered Dietitian, body image coach, style lover and real life postpartum mama. As two moms, we understand the pain points of getting dressed postpartum - this is the post we needed and didn’t have - so, we’ve gotchu covered.
In part 1, we talked about the relatability of having hard moments with clothes when you’re postpartum, small ways to feel like yourself again, and how to make time to get dressed again (even if it feels like there is no time!) In part 2, we will get into:
Hard moments in the dressing room - we’ve all been there
Postpartum summer refresh clothing items - the basics to invest in and the special styling items to make them unique
How to navigate getting clothes on your body (where to shop - online vs in person?!?, how to approach returns, sizing up, etc!)
Ideas and inspo to get you thinking about how to wear things in your closet for all the different things you get dressed for
PS: This post is too long for email so click through to substack to read it in full!
Let’s get to it!
Tory: Before we dig into what to put on your new body - it’s so important to me to share this. So, I remember my first round postpartum, hearing over on IG people suggesting buying new jeans. So, I ventured out to Madewell “LET ME GET MY NEW JEANS THAT FIT” on my to-do list with my husband and newborn. This should be easy, right?
WRONG.
It was so overwhelming and to be honest, sucked so much. What is my size now? What style fits my body? Holy shit is that my stomach? What happened to me? Are those stretch marks? What is that new line? But, I put on belly oil all pregnancy! All of these thoughts flooded my head. I left with 1 pair of new jeans that fit-ish (??) - but let me tell you, Christina - nothing about that experience was easy. I think I had the expectation that it would make me feel “better” about my body, but it really didn’t…Yea, I had a new pair of jeans that “fit,” but BOY did it stir up a lot of emotions and distress about my body I wasn’t expecting.
Christina: I can totally relate to that moment. I think maybe we’ve all had it. I’m not sure there is much we can do to avoid the crappiness of the experience other than go into it with the right expectations (or, no expectations)? In the search for good stuff, there is going to be a lot of not good stuff. I do think going in person (If you can) is better than getting stuff at home – specifically with jeans – because there is so much variability in size/cut/style/fabrication/etc. Also, if you’re already having a bad body day (or a bad day of any kind!) - DON’T GO INTO A DRESSING ROOM. It’s just going to make things worse. Go in with a little makeup on, with freshly washed hair – go in feeling good – whatever that means to you – it makes a difference!
Tory: Also! Bring your baby into the dressing room with you! That visual reminder of WHY your body has changed and the miracle you created can be helpful. It will also help lighten the mood.
Buying new clothes isn’t an act that is going to magically fix your body image. Unfortunately, that doesn’t exist! But, wearing clothes that DO fit your body (and that you like) does actually decrease your body image distress - even just a little.
Okay, so let’s get practical here – how do we get dressed when not everything fits, a lot of stuff might fit weird, but you do want to get dressed? Where do we start? Tell us!
Christina: The good news is that you actually don’t need that much. I think you should be prepared to invest at least a little in your postpartum wardrobe. I’m not talking crazy amounts (and you can do this at any budget!) but - buy yourself some things that fit! Everyone always asks what they should buy for maternity clothes, and one of my biggest pieces of advice is not to forget about postpartum!!! Don’t blow your whole budget on maternity clothes, and definitely don’t spend it all on clothes that you will wear “before, during and after” – I love this idea in theory, but the reality is that you have NO FREAKING IDEA how you’ll feel after and what you’ll want to wear. Prepare accordingly!
Tory: TOTALLY! I think there were very very few hero things I would wear during pregnancy and after.
Christina: The easiest way to get dressed – the way most people who get dressed everyday are doing it – is by having a few uniforms or outfit formulas that you love and can create and recreate with pieces in your closet. It doesn’t mean you’re wearing the same thing everyday, but it does mean you are honest with yourself about what you’re getting dressed for, that you get over any stigma you might have in your head about re-wearing pieces, and that you know how to combine the pieces you have in a variety of ways so that you’re not bored.
When I’ve been postpartum, my “on-repeat” uniforms are things like bike shorts + oversized shirt, elastic waist pants with a more fitted top, and “throw on and go” dresses that are nursing-friendly.
Even though I’m not in the “early postpartum” period right now – I still think about getting dressed in terms of a several uniforms or recipes that I refer to when I’m deciding what to wear each day. You will be surprised by how far you can get with not that many things!
Tory: I love your tip/permission slip of not being afraid of repeating outfits! If you find a great outfit, I love how you suggest taking a photo of it and wearing it again and again.
I’m also here to talk about the unpopular opinion of smartly investing in this newer body instead of waiting until you have the body you “want” before you buy the nice things… you deserve to love the clothes that you have and not waiting until you have the “better” (aka thinner) body to wear them.
Christina: One thousand percent. Do not give into the bullshit that you should hold off until clothes fit. Obviously, buy smart, buy within your budget, and buy things that you can wear today! Don’t buy anything (at least not too many things!) you’ll be too precious with – wear what you have and wear it a lot!! Don’t be afraid of taking a different (aka bigger) size. It’s truly just a number, and it’s very normal to have a variety of sizes in your closet, both because of body changes, and because of daily preferences, and style. Also, if your body changes later on – find a tailor, they will help you with SO MUCH!
Tory: I had this aha moment a few years ago that when I was wearing clothes that didn’t fit properly (or to my liking) that those were the days where my body image was the worst. A pair of jeans that fit fine in the morning but my 2pm (post lunch) would be incredibly uncomfortable, or a shirt that would ride up every time I picked up my son…those were the days I felt the shittiest. AND that realization helped me so much to prioritize fit and styles of clothes that were comfortable for ME.
Christina: Absolutely - There is a difference between your size measurements and the size of specific styles of clothes that you prefer. I prefer a high waisted pant, and that means I often size up and have the waist tailored, and I don’t like low-waisted pants – it doesn’t matter what size they are, I’m not going to like the way they feel on my body.
Christina: I want to get really tactical and focus on ideas and tips that anyone can use to intentionally implement a little closet refresh (if you’re postpartum, or not!) Dressing for summer as a mom (a new mom or a seasoned mom) can be kind of hard – I’m not sure if it’s my age or what but it feels like there are an increasing number of summer pieces that are extremely sheer, extremely short, extremely tiny, and feature many cutouts in various places. Nothing wrong with these things – but, they don’t always meet my functionality & lifestyle needs – I want to be able to wear dresses that won’t blow up with a gentle gust of wind, clothes that aren’t see through when I’m at work or out with my family, and things like that. SO – we’re focused on things that are parenting-friendly, and that can be worn in a bunch of different ways. And also, I need to disclaim – you don’t need all these things! I’m including options!
Tory: What tips do you have to help women figure out what pieces make the most sense for them? I often see things that I love the look of, and am instantly attracted to, but they either don’t make sense for my day-to-day, or I’m not sure how to make them my own?
Christina: It’s a good question – we’re all looking to find that personal style sweet spot – the intersection of what you like, what you feel good in and what you’re actually going to wear. This can be hard! I LOVE a special dress-up piece, and if I always bought everything I love without considering wearability in terms of the life I have, I would end up with a closet of special occasion outfits and the feeling that I have nothing to wear on a day-to-day basis. You need to think about what you actually get dressed for – how do you spend your days? What functionality do you need from your clothes right now? I really loved how
framed this up in a piece she wrote recently – some great questions to consider!Figuring this out can be as simple as thinking about a week – what are you doing on weekdays, what are you doing on the weekends. This doesn’t need to mean that anything is off limits, but it will help you think about what you’re going to wear a lot, versus what you might wear once in a while & shop accordingly!
Here is a category-by-category guide to picking things that make sense for you:
You can shop all these pieces here.
BOTTOMS - PICK 2!!:
Gauze, linen, cotton – whatever you like. Patterned (I personally love a fun lightweight pant!) or solid. This is something to pull on that feels as easy to wear and as comfortable as sweatpants. Wear them with a simple tee, with a ribbed tank top, with an oversized button down, with a slinky tank, over your bathing suit.
This might not be for everyone, but long skirts are everywhere, and I love how they are both feminine and practical! Think something like this for everyday, or something like this for a time when you want or need to look a little more polished. PS if you don’t have one or are unsure – throw a cozy sweater over a long dress and try out how it feels!
Shorts - $ (white whale of not-tight jean shorts!) / $ (nice if you prefer elastic waist!) / $ (gingham!!) / $$
I love a linen or cotton short, maybe you love denim. Either way – they aren’t tight, they aren’t too short. They might have a little bit of elastic in the back to fit well. You’re wearing them with t-shirts and flip flops, with a button down shirt and flats, with breezy blouses.
Tory: What about underwear? I feel like no one buys themselves underwear - it’s the last thing we prioritize as women, yet we wear it every single day. Do you have any tips for buying new bras/underwear? It’s intimidating and daunting…
Christina: Yes - for bras – get sized IN PERSON! Go to Nordstrom, Saks, even Macy’s and have one of the salespeople help size you for a bra. They are SO HELPFUL, and it is amazing to wear a properly fitted bra. I also wrote a long piece about underwear research – my favorites and input from a number of readers, which you can read here.
DRESS(ES)
Throw On & GO - $ (doen vibe at a more accessible price point) $$ (smock top, bra friendly!) / $$ / $$$
The requirements: Structure but not tight, not too short, can be dressed up or down (eg: wear with sneakers or strappy sandals!)
Sporty- $ (don’t sleep on old navy athletic dresses!) / $$ (not tight!) / $$ / $$ (LuluLemon Makes a great athletic dress too!) / $$ (a fave athletic-wear brand!)
TOPS: (you pick 2 that make most sense for your life!)
This can take so many shapes or forms, but the general idea is something that is loose and breezy (good for the heat), not too cropped (you can pick someone up or catch them without clothes riding up super high), and still has some shape.
Some days you are just going to need a tank! I know sometimes when you are postpartum you might not want something fitted, but I always love a slim fitting (not tight!) ribbed tank - especially tucked into something high waisted- one of my go-to pieces when postpartum!! But there are non-fitted options for anyone who prefers something looser.
White t-shirt $ (Uniqlo is a fave!) / $ (ribbed!) / $ (pointelle!) / $ (boxy shape of this one makes it really nice with a high waist short or shirt, but not too cropped!)
I know we said pick 2, but I think everyone needs one or two white t-shirts. Pack a stain stick with them. Spend under $25 so that you are okay with replacing them every season (even without dirty fingers, white t-shirts do not stay fresh forever!). I like to have both a ribbed and a standard cotton.
Structured Top - $ / $$ / $$ (great for work but not too work-y) / $$ (not too corporate vibe of a vest!) / $$$
This could be a vest, or something that just has some visual interest to it (like this!). This type of a piece is especially for anyone going into their office this summer – a vest really pulls your easy-breezy summer pieces like linen pants and maxi skirts into something office appropriate!
Tory: Can we talk about returns for a moment?
Christina: Tory, it is so normal to have to return things -- it's super hard to shop. PDP pages are variable. And the bodies are typically not reflective of real bodies….Set the bar lower when you get something -- because you are going to be SO EXCITED. Be ready to try on a bunch of sizes. Maybe even buy something in two sizes to try. Consider places with good return policies.
Tory: Thank you for saying that. I have had some tricky body image moments that have come up ordering things and NOTHING has fit. I really have needed this to be normalized because for some reason I felt like this was just a ME thing.
Christina: Trust me, it’s not.
SWEATER/LAYERING PIECE - Pick one!
You can (and should!) wear your sweaters all year round, AND, I love a cotton knit for summertime! Stripes or solid, pick your poison. Wear it with a bathing suit, over your shoulders, around your waist…so many opportunities!
Okay, I think most of us have this in our closet!! It’s an always staple, but especially postpartum! It’s easy for summer, it gives you some sun protection, and it’s nursing friendly. It looks great with bike shorts or over an athletic dress. Even if you’re not wearing it - consider using it as a styling tool – around your waist, or as a bathing suit cover up!
SHOE: (PICK 2)
Sneaker/comfort shoe - $$ (Birkenstocks forever) / $$ (Espadrille flat) / $$ (New Balance Sneakers) / $$ (Birkenstock-like, slightly more fashion-y)
This is your everyday type of shoe. You can walk it in, you can slide it on, it’s super comfortable. What you need depends on what your days are like – but something like a sneaker, a comfortable ballet flat, or even a great sandal could fit this bill!
Still comfy, but maybe doesn’t require the ability to run after kids or be on your feet in them all day long. They feel just a little dressy!
BATHING SUIT: $$ (available in tall and normal torso!) / $$ (ruching is A+!) / $$ / $$ (
has this one!)
Christina: Bathing suit is the dreaded, but necessary summer purchase. You only need 1 (or 2). Find something that is comfortable and you can move in and then don’t think about it anymore!
Tory: Putting on a bathing suit for the first time over the course of the summer can bring up a lot of feelings. You are not the only one that is feeling this way - I think every woman is. Just know your body may look different than it did last year - it may sag more, touch more, have more lines and curves. That is normal! Your body is supposed to change.
And please remember as you step out at the pool or on the beach, no one is thinking about your body as much as they are their own.
PERSONALITY PIECES TO MAKE GETTING DRESSED MORE FUN:
These are the things that are key to making your outfits interesting. They add personality, fun, variety, and, they have nothing to do with what phase or stage your body is in! This is how you have fun and change things up when you are wearing and re-wearing the same pieces and formulas all summer long! Etsy is a treasure trove for these types of thing – have fun with the search!
Necklaces - $ / $ (corded) / $ / $ / $$ (multicolor) / $
A chunky beaded necklace, a statement gold layering piece, a beaded cord – could be any or all of the above. Summer is a great opportunity to play around with colorful and interesting jewelry, and there is no better palette for a fun stack than a simple tee or tank!
Bags - $ / $ (so fun!) / $ (for a night out!) / $$ (for all the things!) / $$ (so cute and fun!)
Summer is a great time to have a few bags that are awesome, without needing to spend a lot! I would go for something big and something small and
Hats- $ / $$ (best bucket hat!) / $$ (wide brim)
They protect your face from the sun, hide unstyled hair, and add a lot to outfits. Wear a baseball cap or a wide-brim or a bucket hat! Have fun with it!
Thank you so much for reading!! We can’t wait to hear what you think – drop questions in the comments + let us know what other topics you’d love for the two of us to tackle!!
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Note: While both of us have experienced body image distress postpartum, we benefit from unearned privileges living in straight-sized bodies. While the distress is real and valid, it is important to note that we do not face the added challenges that come with living in a marginalized body when it comes to clothing.
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Buying less maternity clothes and budgeting more for postpartum was such helpful advice from you!
Love the series! Thank you! 🌻