What's Missing, and What am I doing here?

I promise this is not the existential crisis that it sounds like!

This is a more personal post, off-schedule from my regular cadence. No links/shopping today, just some deep thoughts on what I’m trying to do by writing & continue to write this newsletter. Normal scheduling resumes on Friday!

I have been thinking a lot lately about what I’m doing here, and trying to figure out a roadmap for how I want to move forward with this side hobby. It has felt really good to have something I’m interested in and dedicating time to besides my kids, my family and my real job! The things I’ve been writing about, they’ve been rattling around in my head for a very long time. So, if nothing else other than getting it out of my head, at least I have accomplished that.

I’ve actually been here on

Substack

for awhile but it took a lot of writing for me to start to hone in on “what I’m doing!” I took a nearly 12 year hiatus from writing, after being an avid writer in high school and college (English & Social Studies were my favorite subjects & I majored in Poli Sci with a focus on political philosophy!), and then only writing for business purposes throughout my actual career (looking at you, e-mails, corp memos & PowerPoint!) it feels GREAT to be back in the groove, and have a small readership (thank you for being here!), and especially to read so many other incredible newsletters & writers.

I am life-long lover of style and fashion. Once, in high school, I had a friend tell me she thought my closet would be clueless-esque, and was shocked to find I had a small closet, with a small, but mighty selection of clothes! I love getting dressed, and helping other people find things that fit their style. Growing up, when we went shopping, or received gifts, my mom always used to tell me, “someday you’ll be glad to have something that isn’t the same as everyone else.” While I didn’t always appreciate that advice at the time, it’s something I’ve come to live by. I don’t want the “it” thing for the purpose of being the thing, I want the thing that is perfect for me, and to help others get dressed with pieces that are perfect for them.

At the advice of several other writers on Substack who have built incredibly successful newsletters and followings, I have been honing in on what I want to be focused on and write about by defining what I think is missing. And what I think is missing (or, more specifically, what I haven’t seen enough of) is how to define your personal style, streamline your shopping (eg: shop with intent and not buy, buy, buy), get dressed and feel great - for women in their 30s and beyond (especially, but not exclusively, for postpartum moms).

These women have a wide range of needs for their closet - work, going out with friends, on dates, to a variety of events, travel, kids activities, etc. Maybe she feels like she has nothing to wear, or she’s wearing the same thing constantly and it doesn’t feel good, or she doesn’t have time to shop, or her clothes aren’t showing up for her the way she wants them too.

These women are prepared to invest in clothes to get quality items, but a closet full of designer items is not in her budget. And yet, she doesn’t only want Amazon or fast fashion (although some fast fashion pieces are useful building blocks). She might (like me), be working towards being a more conscious consumer. For her, form and function are equally important. Comfort is key but so is style and feeling like yourself. Like you can do anything in an outfit. Nothing should be too precious to wear, but everything should feel great.

I have felt that Instagram is not a projection of real life so much anymore, and I am craving that “real life” - what I actually wear to get dressed everyday! What are pieces and approaches that will make getting dressed feel easy and accessible and fun. How I shop for a season, how I pack for a trip, how I plan what I’m going to wear for a special event, etc. I also don’t want to be “buy, buy, buy.” I am conscious of over-consumerism, and how much cost of living has risen all over the country in the past several years. I want to help you shop (with intent), but also wear what you have, so that you don’t constantly feel like you are on on the buy something new hamster wheel.

I’ll always been an instagram gal, but I am trying to spend less time on my phone, so I will be balancing content between Substack and Instagram.

I hope to also be a balance of inspirational and realistic, with a focus on execution - meaning that I show what I’m shopping, buying & how I’m wearing those pieces season over season, year over year, as well as what I’m dreaming about wearing (I’m never not thinking about the day when I’m not spending $$$ on childcare and can buy myself something REALLLLYYYY nice).

I want to help you look at your closet and feel joy & excitement about getting dressed.

This feels wild so say, but I have been thinking about it a lot the past few months - In the future, I’d love to offer some of this as a service. Or, a couple of services, across a spectrum - ranging from a full style review & wardrobe edit & outfit styling, to something more fit-for-purpose, like shopping for a season, packing for a trip or or searching for a specific item. Many details to figure out here, but I hope to be able to test out some of this soon! (and if you are interested in this, please let me know!)

And, I want to continue to talk and share about adulthood, partnerhood/marriage, work, my family & motherhood and basically the other things that are happening in my life and how the juggle happens. I love to hear/see/read about this from others and normalize that it’s hard for everyone and we’re all just doing our best to figure it out! When I’m not writing, the thoughts are bouncing around in my head, so getting it down on paper is important!

If you got all the way to the end, thank you so much for reading, and for being here. I hope this resonates with you too, and that I can be the friend you look to when you don’t know what to wear!

I would love to hear any feedback you have! In the comments, my chat, or on Instagram! XX