Traveling with Kids
when the difference between a trip and a vacation really solidifies...
I started writing this from the backseat of my car, with my body sandwiched between two car seats. The toddler on my left is happily watching Daniel tiger on his tablet (his first time using a tablet, so, a highly anticipated experience that is providing a lot of entertainment). The baby on my right is currently passed out after crying for the better part of three hours.
Ah, trips with kids!
We haven’t traveled much with two kids because of COVID. Just a couple local trips that haven’t required more than an hour or two in the car. Before COVID, though, we traveled with just one baby and quickly understood the distinction that other parents referred to — the distinction between a vacation and a trip with kids. If you don’t immediately understand what I am talking about, the idea is that a vacation with (little) kids is actually a trip, because there isn’t much about it that’s vacation-like.
I have sort of found myself hating this phrase, even though it is 100% accurate. It makes it sound like traveling with kids is just work. Don’t get me wrong - it is a lot of work. You deal with logistics and details your pre-kid brain couldn’t have ever dreamed up. You are still tending to the many needs and impulses of little children. In many ways, when you go away with kids you are just doing the same things you would do at home, only in a new or different location. But honestly, sometimes being in a new place is the breath of fresh air that we all need. In my family, we like a routine and our days and weeks have a strong cadence. While we do keep a lot of that routine when we’re on vacation (1-3PM is naptime and that is the most sacred time of my day thank you very much), it also feels good as hell to just do fun stuff.
It feels good to go out for a big breakfast just for fun and to get ice cream in the afternoon for no reason. It is fun to spend a morning at the beach watching my newly walking baby literally toddle around looking at shells and pointing at seagulls (even if I do spend a lot of time swiping sand and shells out of out her mouth). It feels good to sit on the porch and drink a margarita and read my book during naptime and not have to squeeze in any chores. It’s amazing to not cook dinner for an entire week. It’s fun to watch my kids see a new playground and lose their minds over climbing structures that we don’t have at home. I love watching my three-year-old “dip toes” in the ocean which ultimately turns into full-body soaks while laughing hysterically the entire time. I’m happy to treat my kids to a new toy or book without worrying about whether I am spoiling them and just enjoying how excited they are at the prospect of picking out something new for themselves.
Would it be amazing to be on a beach with just my husband (or with just adult friends) and be able to not think about a single little-person need or desire and pretend we only have to take care of ourselves for a few days? 100 percent. Obviously. But, that’s not the only way to feel like I’m getting a vacation. And thank goodness for that because a kid-free vacation is not that easy to pull off!
I get the distinction between a trip and a vacation, and I still like traveling with my kids. The key (for me) is to have the right expectations (read: no expectations) so that you’re not mad/sad/disappointed when shit hits the fan. My husband and I always pick a thing or two that we want to make sure we get to do and prioritize those things above everything else. We pick things for our kids, and as they get older we plan to let them pick those 1-2 things themselves. Another key success factor (lol, can you tell I’m a consultant?) is always finding a way to have some childcare support so you do get a break of some kind. This can be challenging for a variety of reasons when you are far from home, but I’ve had a lot of success with local nanny/babysitter placement companies, and it’s gotten a lot easier to leave my kids as they’ve gotten a little older (and probably as I have been a parent for longer).
It feels so freaking good to go out to dinner with your spouse and skip out on a couple of nights of bedtimes. It felt amazing to go shopping in A REAL LIVE BOUTIQUE, browsing around and seeing and touching all the beautiful clothes. My husband trailing me around wondering when we could leave was not that unlike having a small child in tow, but at least I could trust him not to ruin every item in site (sort of).
And of course, it feels so good (honestly always, but especially now after two years of the weirdest relationship with getting dressed and going out) to have a reason to pick out a few new things, and put on cute outfits that you might not pull out at home. I like to draw out the process of getting ready for a trip, even if it means my system for keeping track of everything I need/have packed is semi-psychotic and always results in last minute scrambles and stress!
This year, we didn’t make it anywhere tropical, but the weather was warmer than what we are used to in MA, so I was happy to be able to pick out a few new warmer-weather dresses, and pack some of my spring favorites. It didn’t stop me from eyeing some of the best of the resort-wear items that have been coming out in a steady stream since early this winter, and even some of the early spring-summer pieces that are coming out now. So many fun prints, bright colors and fun silhouettes — all clothes that could transport you to a vacation even if you are at home. You can see all the outfits I wore on my most recent trip/vacation here, and even more of my favorite items below. Happy spring, happy shopping, happy vacation planning!
Black Bathing Suit / 2. Linen Blend Pants / 3. Circe Crop Top / 4. Espadrille / 5. Printed Bathing Suit / 6. Larkyn Dress / 7. Red Dress / 8. Denim Shorts / 9. Block Heel Mule / 10. Floral Midi Dress / 11. Floral Midi Dress / 12. Linen Button up / 13. Beach Sarong / 14. La Riva Top / 15. Short Sleeve Dress / 16. Moses Sandals / 17. Collared Sweater / 18. Violetta Dress /
Black Bathing Suit - I don’t know why a classic, simple, black one piece is so hard to find, but it is. This one is really nice, and although it’s pricey, it’s honestly the only suit I need for this spring/summer.
Linen Blend Pants - Especially as the weather warms up, it’s nice to have a pants alternative to jeans. These look perfect, and I think the linen blend means they won’t wrinkle too much! Add a body suit, espadrilles and some gold earrings and boom.
Circe Crop Top - It is well known that I believe this brand can do no wrong, and the new spring collection is no different. I love basically everything, but this blouse is jumping out at me.
Espadrille - I think this is a fun fresh take on an espadrille. The wedge is comfortable as heck, and you don’t have to deal with the long ties. Plus, would go with anything! I have a pair of classic castaner black espadrilles and I would love them to make this style in a cream to add to my closet this summer!
Printed Bathing Suit - If I already had a perfect black or navy one-piece bathing suit, then I would be investing in this one this year. It’s pricey, for sure, but I think swimsuits are worth the spend, especially to find one that has a nice fit, makes you feel great and you aren’t constantly pulling at and readjusting. Also, you have to be okay with only having a few swimsuits in rotation - I think a great dark solid color (IMO black or navy), a cool printed one, and maybe 1 two piece or something with fun cutouts is a very good collection!
Larkyn Dress - This screams warm weather getaway, and is just happy colors that I could see myself reaching for over and over again.
Red Dress - Love this for a special night out!
Denim Shorts - I don’t know why denim shorts are so freaking hard to find but they are. I have heard great things about this pair, especially if you are someone (like me) who has athletic thighs and also wants shorts that have some room. I love my AGOLDE Parker Longs which I believe to be the perfect length and there are some new washes this year!
Block Heel Mule - I am seeing this shoe shape everywhere! I always love the look of a high heel, but honestly, they hurt, and right now, I need comfort and cuteness. These fit the bill and could go with just about anything!
Floral Midi Dress - This dress is just absolute throw on and go. You could wear it over a bathing suit, or dress it up. It would look good with any of the sandals I’ve included here. Add a belt if you want, or throw a jean jacket on top and you have so many cute outfit options, and I think the color is a little unexpected, but not too crazy!
Floral Midi Dress - Another brand I have an ongoing obsession with. I actually love all the color-ways that this dress comes in. Just seems so wearable. I am definitely having such a moment with dresses, and the idea of just having to pull one thing out to put on and feel great. I think this would look so cute with white sneakers.
Linen Button up - A light-weight button up shirt is a warm-weather closet staple. Worn with jean shorts, as a coverup, tied with high waisted pants, over a slinky dress. So many ways to wear it and it just looks so good!
Beach Sarong - I have always called this thing a sarong, although I keep on hearing the term pareo…honestly don’t know the difference, but this is the perfect thing to have to pull on over your bathing suit, and could be even worn out.
La Riva Top - This top is special and even though it has a small sleeve, looks flowy enough to be comfortable even on a really hot day. Would look so great with the white pants or jean shorts!
Short Sleeve Dress - I love the little cap sleeve sweetness of this dress. I haven’t ever bought anything from this brand, but I have eyed several pieces. We have some family photos planned for May and I am thinking this dress might work very nicely!
Moses Sandals - I have a pair of moses sandals in bright blue and they get a lot of wear. I am thinking I may add a slightly more neutral color this year!
Collared Sweater - I have this thing with sweaters. I want to wear them even when it’s warm out. Weird, I know, but this requires some light weight knits and this fits the bill! I love the look of this with shorts or over a dress!
Violetta Dress - This is the type of dress you could plan a whole trip around!